Dirty Talk

Dirty Talk

 An attempt at Dual Meaning Word Play 

Use of English language

How to use words to give two meanings

HUMOUR

By

K. Venugopal Menon

Also known a VenuG

And

http://twitter.com/Venuspeak

@Venuspeak

Written extempore on twitter using hash tag #DirtyMorningAblutions

On

Monday, March 19, 2012

At

Kolkata/Calcutta , India (CCU)

Keeeeeeeeeeeeeeep Smiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiling

READ THIS in a fast mode

Feel like having Pot.. 

Cm on Baybey , Let me take you all into my mouth

I have all bristles & hair between my teeth ...

Mmm you smell so Goood 

The mouths full of white foam..

Its so HARD ...

Oh! Now I have Froth & bubbled white gooey liquid all o'er my face now.. 
Awww I’m so Hawt..

Why does it take so many buttons to get NAKED!

Let Me TURN YOU ON NOW :D

Awwww I'm so Wet now..

Oh Baybey Mmm it feels so Goood..

Mmm Keeeeeep it coming Baybeh ...

I feel like I totally spent..

Awwww I wanna you Rub all over me Honey..

Oooo its so Biggg...

I want all of you ON me all at once..

I'm dripping..  

 

  

Now read the same lines

With explanation in the next line

BuaHaHaHa

Keep Laughing

The First line is as above

The Second being what action it indicates

Feel like having Pot..

I need to use the WC really !

Cm on Baybey , Let me take you all into my mouth 

I take the toothbrush into my mouth

Mmm you smell so Goood  

The toothpaste smells like peppermint

I have all bristles & hair between my teeth ...

When I brush my teeth with a nylon toothbrush !

The mouths full of white foam..

With Colgate Toothpaste of course :D

  

Its so HARD...

My 2 day old stubble you perverts J

 

Oh! Now I have Froth & bubbled white gooey liquid all o'er my face now..

Its actually The Old Spice Shaving Foam Damnit !

Awww I’m so Hawt..

It’s the month of March & in   Calcutta.. Summer has really begun :-)

   

Why does it take so many buttons to get NAKED!

Since I'm getting LATE I need to take off my clothes in a hurry you see J

Let Me TURN YOU ON NOW :D

The Shower Knob Bwahaha

Awwww I'm so Wet now..

As I’m now, Under the shower what else :p

Oh Baybey Mmm it feels so Goood..

The Cool Shower sprinkle

Mmm Keeeeeep the Golden Misty Rain coming Baybeh ...

The Shower drizzle

I feel like I totally spent..

Totally about Half an hour time in the Bath

Awwww I wanna you Rub all over me Honey..

Now I’m talking, To my Turkish Bath Towel

 

Oooo its so Biggg...

The Brut Musk Deodorant Canister

I want all of you ON me all at once..

I want now, to Quickly put on clothes :D

 

I'm dripping sssssssssssoooooooo much sweetheart..

Water dripping from hair after a bath

 

  Hope you liked it 

If you do

Please Comment

If you don't

Please Comment

THANK YOU

Good Night 

 

  

Neeley Gagan Ke Tale Shuddha Hindi Kavita in Chayavaad

A very instant creation

Wrrtten in 10 minutes

at Dakshinapan , Dhakuria 

on 

Saturday 18th February , 2012

Tune in Salil Choudhury/ Manna Dey style

Genre : Hindi Chayavaad

Neeley Gagan ke Taley

Main

Neeley Gagan Ke Taley

Panchi yun udtey chale

Taaron ki Chaon mein

Chanda Naav mein

Mera Man Sair Karey

Stanza 1

Ik pal mein

Drishti Udaan bharey

Dooje Pal

Meri ye pyaas marey

Vichlit hai

Kyon mera chit yoon

Suntey hi

Koyal ki Peehu Peehu

Tham jao , Sawaal merey

Main

Neeley Gagan Ke Taley

Panchi yun udtey chale

Taaron ki Chaon mein

Chanda Naav mein

Mera Man Sair Karey

Stanza 2

Khushboo Teri

Saawni Hawaaon mein

Aahat Teri

Saanson kePaanv mein

Chaahat teri

Mere Badan Ko

Chupke Se 

Choo mere tan ko

Aa mere, lag jaa Galey

Main

Neeley Gagan Ke Taley

Panchi yun udtey chale

Taaron ki Chaon mein

Chanda Naav mein

Mera Man Sair Karey

Stanza 3

Milna Ye

Yoon jaise preet hui

Bandhan apna

Milan ki dhaga-sui

Pranay thaa

Ke jaise Shaadi mui

Tera sparsh

Malmal ya Semal-Rui

Laga le. Saat pherey

Main

Neeley Gagan Ke Taley

Panchi yun udtey chale

Taaron ki Chaon mein

Chanda Naav mein

Mera Man Sair Karey

Stanza 4

Janamaantar ka

Jaisey ye Saath ho

Saaton Jahaan

Haathon mein Haath ho

Sapnon mein

Har din hi Baat ho

Prerna meri

Jaisey Poonam ki Raat ho

Kavita meri na marey

Main

Neeley Gagan Ke Taley

Panchi yun udtey chale

Taaron ki Chaon mein

Chanda Naav mein

Mera Man Sair Karey

will record tonight 

&

Post on youtube

check

my youtube channel

at link below

¥EN Short for Youth Entertainment Network

Demi Moore in The Indecent Proposal .. God What a Beautiful Woman

The above picture belongs to Paramount Pictures

Used just to remmber* The Beautiful Woman*

I so admire

due to This tweet

via @ikaveri

on twitter

" CBSNews BREAKING: Demi Moore friend who called 911 describes actress as barely conscious and convulsing "

What a Movie What a Story

The Elegant & Beautiful Demi Moore as Diana Murphy with Robert Redford in The Movie Indecent Proposal. The Photo is copyrighted to Paramount Pictures in 1993 

What an Elegant and exquisitely sophisticated beautiful woman

Demi Moore

Oh !!! God .. be Good To Her

Amen :(((

When to write a Song ? Read on Personal viewpoint from VenuG

HOW & WHEN TO WRITE GREAT SONGS

A PERSONAL OPINION by VenuG

As Long As YOU 

Are in LOVE 

a GOOD SONG 

ESCAPES YOU !!! 

As Long as YOU 

are SWAYED 

By 

INFATUATED GIRL / BOY FANS 

Your Song Doesn't Touch a Chord 

So wanna write a GOOD SONG 

STAY OFF GALS / BOYS 

Write when you are on your LOWEST EBB 

Keeeeeep Writing 

Venuspeak 

¥enjoy 

Examples 


1 Girl Friend / Boy Friend Ditches you / found cheating 

2 A Gig is Cancelled 

3 Someone you trusted as your friend / philosopher / guide , bitches / backbites / turns his/her back on you 

4 You get Bad Press 

5 When you fail terribly in ANYTHING 

6 You See your Ex after Ages 

7 Your Wife Nags you , For no fault of yours 

8 Your Kids Behave Arrogantly , & insensitively towards you !!! 

9 You feel Strongly about any Social / Economical / Political Issue 

10 Whenever you mutter under the breath , *WTF*

WHY ? 

Because , when you're Angry / Distressed 

Brain Loses its control on Rationalism 

And The REAL YOU 

Is writing the Song !!! 

That's How The Best Creatives Create 

Hussain , Rushdie , Picasso , Floyd , Cat Stevens , Lennon , Majrooh , Kabir , Ghalib , Abdul Rahim Khankhna , Clapton , WInehouse , Morrison , Cobain , Marley 

Examples 
Bryan Adams Summer of 69 

Pink Floyd Brick in The Wall 

Cat Stevens Wild World 

Clapton Wonderful Tonight 

Marley Wake Up Stand Up 

Lennon Imagine 

Nickelback Rockstar 

Freddie Mercury Queen Bohemian Rhapsody 



Club 27 


Kurt Cobain Polly 

Amy Winehouse Rehab 

Jim Morrison Dawn's Highways , Light My Fire 

Janis Joplin Nobody Knows you when you are down , Me & Bobby Mcgee 

Jimi Hendrix On Stage Improvisation Purple Haze 



Bob Dylan WOW 

Blowing in The Wind 
Like a Rolling Stone 
Lonesome Death of Hattie Carroll 
Talkin John Birch Paranoid Blues 

Tracy Chapman Fast Car 


Bobby McFarlane Don't Worry Be Happy 


Hindi


Meena Kumari Chanda Thanha Hai, Aasman Tanha 
Kabir Kaankar paathar baanch ke .. kya behra hai khuda ??

Mirza Asadullah Ghalib Hazaaron Khwahishey
 
Ram Prasad Bismil Sarfaroshi ki tamanna .. dekhna hai jor kitna baaju-e-kaatil mein hai


Pradip Dekh Tere Sansar ki Haalat 

Shalendra Teen Kanaster 


Bharat Vyas Dhandhey Ki Kuch Baat Karo Kuch Paise Jodo 


Kishore Kumar Peechey Pad Gaya Income Taxam 


Dhanush Kolaveri Di 


Neeraj Shokhiyon Mein Ghola Jaye phoolon ka Shabab , Hari Hari Vasundhara 

Billy Joel Just The Way you are 


Tina Turner I will Survive 


Elvis Presley That's All Right Mama 


Paul Mcartney Eleanor Rigby 


George Harrison Taxman , Bangladesh 


Norman Gimbel Killing Me Softly With His Song 




VenuG :-) 

I'm a flirt 


Hanging Around in a Thong 


Mujhse Pyar Karti Hai Woh 


I grabbed The Bottle & Wrote This Bloody Song 

Keeeeeep Writing 

Keeeeeep Rocking 

Keeeeeep Smiiliiiing 

¥enjoy

Kolkata

28th January , 2012

Banned in Hell And Band in Heaven .. Genre Rhythm And Blues a new song by VenuG

Banned in Hell And Band in Heaven .. 

Genre Jazz Rhythm And Blues (R & B) 

A new song by VenuG

A very Dark Song

To be sung in a throaty 

Dolly Parton Manner

Written by VenuG

Not my usual style

Very Morbid & Dark Song

Written on 

14th January 2012

Kolkata

January 27th 2012

Quality of video is a good as the source
i.e. Nokia E63 video camera
2 megapixel and a really rotten mic
So due apologies
but you get a hint of harmony and tune.

rough video
" I grabbed the bottle & wrote this bloody song"
played on my Hohner Coronation 12 note changer Harmonica,  
playing 12 Note Blues VenuG

My Hohner Coronation 12 note changer Harmonica, 

 " Banned in Hell And A Band in Heaven "
" I grabbed the bottle & wrote this bloody song"

(Original Sneak Peek from Venuspeak ) by VenuG

NOTE $$$ INDICATES STRETCH THE WORDS IN A DROOL

STANZA 1

I /lost  my /pick

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

that/ made me /Sick

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Made/ from /silicone

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

& /Now its / gone

What /a bloo$$$$dy/ Di$$$$$ck

Can't be Ato$$$$$$$ned

Big /Loser/ Prick

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

I$$$ /ha$$d to be /sto$$$ned 

(high on cocaine)

I$$$t / Got me / Sti$$$ck

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

to$$ / G Minor / To$$$$$$ne

PIANO PIECE

I GRA$$$$BBED THE BAA$$TLE 

&

WROTE THIS BLOODY SONG

STANZA 2

I / Stu$$mbled / Ho$$$me

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Wa$$s /Hit  by / Bo$$mb

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Hit / Stomped & kicked

Wa$$s / Na$$gged & / Picked

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

M$$$$y / Face was / Nu$$$mb

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

$$I / felt so$$$ / Du$$$mb

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

PIANO PIECE

I GRA$$$$BBED THE BAA$$TLE 

&

WROTE THIS BLOODY SONG

STANZA 3

She$$ / picked the / Sho$$vel

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

$$I / felt my / Bo$$$wel

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

She$$ / Shoved some / Gra$$vel

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

My$$$ / Mind / Ti$$me Travelled

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Hea$$$rt / Gave a / Si$$$gh

$$$I / Still felt / Hi$$$$gh

PIANO PIECE

I GRA$$$$BBED THE BAA$$TLE 

&

WROTE THIS BLOODY SONG

STANZA 4

Wh$$en / I Reached / He$$aven

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

T'wa$$$s/ Quarter Past / Se$$$ven

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Angel / & / Lord

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

With / Bed & / Board

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

$$$I / Felt so / Bo$$$red

Fle$$sh / wa$$$s / De$$$bow$$$ned

PIANO PIECE

GATHERED MY BONES

&

WROTE THIS BLOODY SONG

FINAL

SATNZA 5

Then / God just / spoke

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Winked & / gave me / Poke

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Was / Naughty Bloke

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Whatay / Master / stroke

Jha Jhang Jha Jhang ( guitar pieces not to be sung)

Into /a/ Jiggly /wiggle  

they both just broke 

PIANO PIECE

HE GRABBED MY NECK

&

THUNDERED

FORM A BLOODY BAND

Poooof 

This was a painful experience

to write this song

I had to delve deep

into the worst experiences

reminiscense's

of all my life

Not neccessary personal

This are great words

Its copyrighted

have given for IPR

don't copy without permission

January 27th 2012

Kolkata