Saturday, August 25, 2012

Looking to open a totally wired CASA Account in Kolkata in a PSU Bank

Before Reading this post,
I request you to read this excellent slide presentation
"E-Banking Seminar"
(54 Slides Brilliantly researched material on e-banking)
Yuben Joseph


This is not Marketing
This is not a Bluff
I am raring to go into New Business Canvassing
Subject to you are Under 35 Years of Age
Are willing to Use Banking services
Via Mobile / PC / Desktop / Laptop / Tab / ATM

Whatever existing banking channels available on Earth
do exist here
Subject to
Your KYC being complete

A Passport / Voter ID Card ? Aadhar Card / Driving Licence / Te;ephone Bill / A Government Issued identity from West Bengal / GoI

Call me +91 900 791 0731
Either I will contact you personally
Or a colleague of mine
Wherever you are Keep Your document photo copy + 2 photographs

Only for Kolkata City
For the following
I will guide you to a frined of mine
West Bengal
Mumbai Municipal Limits 

Please Go through The Following links

1 Syndicate Bank Website LINK

2 Online shopping and Utility Payments Write up & Details LINK

3 e-payment of Taxes Online LINK Details

4 Customer Care Online Tax Payment FAQ's LINK

5 Customer Care Toll Free Voice Mail & Credit Card Toll Free Numbers LINK

6 Mobile Banking  Transfer Money through Mobile from selected handsets from one mobile phone to another in 30 second LINK with application form and guidelines and FAQ's

7 FAQ's of How Mobile Financial Transactions take place IMPS ( Inter Mobile Payment Service ) Link

8 The List of Mobile Handsets on which the IMPS ( Inter Mobile Payment Service ) works LINK

9 What to expect when you open a CASA Saving account with us
  AS THEY EXIST ON 25Th August, 2012

1 Deposit Ra 1000 with Casa opening form duly filled with email + mobile number + KYC details + 2 photographs + an application for Debit card & Internet Banking & Mobile Banking
Chose appropriate Deposit product relevant for YOU LINK

a) Cheque Book
b) Pass Book
c) Debit Card VISA which you can use online for purchases ( with CVC after VISA verification)
d) Internet Banking Password in a week
e) Mobile financial transaction password but you also need to register the beneficiary to whom you will transfer money & they also should have the GPRS enabled phones
f) Whatever links I have given above for Online Tax Payments & Utility Payments require registration and are restricted to cities where such Utility Payment systems exist.
e) you can push NEFT transaction through your internet banking facility from your Desktop/Laptop/Tab./Mobile itself ( subject to it able to access website)
g) From internet banking you can print statement of account, view details of 3 accounts , request for cheque-book.

So you can use Debit Card (ATM) Internet Banking ( Web) and IMPS (Mobile Phone) and bank without stepping into our premises. It works seamlessly, it does, I can vouch for it, because I use all the above frequently.The Only facility I don't use *FREQUENTLY* is IMPS though I use it

Apart from the above

We have a Credit Card
One of the Best Cashless Mediclaim Insurance policy with partnership with United India Insurance Co (  GIC Company) SyndArogya Mediclaim Policy all details HERE 

Feel Free
call me
+91 900 791 0731

Shubh Ratri

Caution : Please Never Hand Over CASH to anyone except on the Bank Counter


Wednesday, August 22, 2012

The 12 Sects Born to a Peryai ( Reed Weaver ) Lower Caste Harijan Woman of Kerala as per Peryai Patta Panthirukulam mythological Story

Kolkata, Wednesday Nd August, 2012

Vayailla Kunnilappan
The Boy God without a Mouth
 "If the child had a mouth, God would feed it " 
A Legend from Malayalam Mythology
As Percieved by Kottarathil Sankunni
in his Book
Aithihiya Mala
A Garland of Legends

Kottarathil Sankunni

Monday, August 20, 2012

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.Confucius. My conversation with My 15 year old son Dhruv

Monday 20Th August, 2012.
Tales from a Dad & Son
After a Long time, I felt like having a Dad Son pep talk with my highly creative 15 year Old Son Dhruv
He is in Class X at the moment

How creative?
here is an example
Transformers The Game Decepticons Mission 1 Made by Dhruv
Video & Music mixing
at 13 that is no mean feat

Saturday, August 18, 2012

How did The CAG Mr Vinod Rai arrive at the loss of Ra 1.68 lakh crores for Coalgate & Ra 1.77 lakh crores for 2G ? A Mystery

THIS is my Facebook status at this very moment !!! in full reproduced here
words in BOLD added in this blog
Weekend Homework for Weakened Spirits
Weak Kneed Students
We Need Scientists
Wynad Arrack/Chaarayam (Kallu ) Drinkers
Gods Own Country Liquor
My Links on the subject
My Google search RESULT
CAG: Hole in exchequer LINK
CAG has overstepped its constitutional mandate LINK
Vinod Rai on wikipedia
CAG report on Coal Blocks DIAL on Thursday LINK
CAG Vinod Rai An Accountant who's calling government to account LINK
A watchdog does more harm to the government than the opposition LINK
Congress defends allotment of Coal Blocks, Slams CAG LINK
Can anyone challenge the CAG ? LINK
Where Donkeys Fly by Surjeet Bhalla ROFL Don't miss this will help the geeks design the calculator to Suit Mr Vinod Rai and his ilk LINK
CORRIGENDUM  : The figure indicated by CAG is Ra 1,86,000 crores & NOT Ra 1,68,000 crore as mentioned in my Facebook status 
Further the figures were revised from Ra 55,000 crores to Ra 10.7 lakh crores to Ra 1.86 lakh crores. 
Kaisa Tera Dhoka
Kaisa Tera Pyaar
Tera  e-portional Atyaachaar

Friday, August 17, 2012

Winning Against Odds : Story of a Boy From North East India, Who Dared to Dream & Won


             This is a story of H 30, From Manipur(North East) , Probationary Officer, working for a PSU BANK, working in North East, who got this job against all odds. 13 Yrs ago in 1999, H 17, passed out from School, in a tiny village in Manipur.

          Then as soon as he passed out from school, Violence & Strife Started.  But H had a Dream, He wanted a job, but he wanted a job that was in the Officer cadre, in any Government/Semi-Government Organisation. He was ready to go to any extent of hard work and labour, and travel as many miles for the job, as the organisation, which would later employ him sent him to. He that is H, was so passionate in his dream, That all this ruckus, hullabulloo and violent, disturbances did not shake him up at all. On the contrary, it made his resolve, hunger and dedication to his goals,
even more stronger..

                   H was a pragmatinc young boy, son of a very poor farmer, from Rural Manipur. So, you can imagine, what infrastructure means and facilities he had, for education and future career aspirations. Then started H's planning and strategy. He sat with his father, and told him, that he wanted to study further and finally get a managerial job..

                      He also told him that he was mature enugh to understand the financial means of his father, and
hence did not want himself to be a burden on the family anymore. He will prepare himself, by reading books, journals and magazines at home, which his father must arrange to be delivered at home, the payment for which, H would make, by doing odd jobs in their village as well as nearest mofussil town. H now started doing Odd jobs and saving money,which he did for the next for 7 years from 1999-2005, side by side buying and reading books, journals and newspapers
After March 2005, he left for Pune, where he enrolled for a simple BA degree in Political Science, from a private college. During this time he also worked as waiter and bell boy in various hotels in Pune. In 2008 he cleared his BA, And thus was the 1st graduate of his tribal village in Manipur. In 2009 November, he applied for the IPBS conducted, common joint recruitment test, for the post of Probationary Officer ( PO ) In Junior Management Grade Scale I for 19 PSU Banks. He was successful in the written exam, appeared for an interview, where too he was deemed fit for the job. He was selected and allotted to one of the 19 Banks, which was one of the better Banks, appointed and trained and further posted in a big branch luckily in The North East itself.

                       At this moment H has completed 23 months of service and in 1 months time, his job is likely
to be confirmed, in the month September, 2012. This poor boy, had everything against him, even luck and fortune gave him lot of disadvantages and handicaps, but still, he did'nt lose heart, went from strife to peace, worked 4 his
BA & fulfilled his Dream. To work in Managerial Cadre of a well known PSU with a reputation and status in the Society.

               H's batchmates? IIT B-Techs, MBA's from premier B-Schools, C.A.'s ICWA's, B.Sc Agriculture from Nellore / Jobner, Fashion Designers from NIFT (YES 5 OF THEM) AND 3 IIIT Grads + IIM's, I am confident, in 2025, that is 13 Years from Now this Dude H will shine and Join Top Management of the organisation.  I have hidden H's identity, I know him well, I mentor him, ( NOW NOT BEFORE AS AN UNDERSTUDY) but want to guard his identity
                    The total credit of success of H is his own, and the support of his teachers andparents.
No one among us has any role in his success. So when I see the exodus of Youth from The North East Pune & Bangalore to the strife ridden Assam and Manipur, it reminds me of H.

MORAL OF THE STORY The Youth from The North East, studying and working in Pune, Mysore, Bangalore and the rest of India
Must Follow What H Did. H is an inspiring figure for them. Jai Hind Jai Bharat. Sare Jahan se achcha, Hindustan hamara.


Monday, August 13, 2012

David Cameron says 2 hours of Bollywood Dancing cannot be categorised as a Sport. Venuspeak says Camera on Bollywood Dancing is a Great Sport But David Cameron is Not a Great Sport

If "Bolywood Dancing"

Were supposedly, included at #Rio2016

As an Olympic *Sport*

India would still get a wooden spoon!

Gold would go to Katrina Kaif & Not Sonakshi Sinha,

Silver to Barbara Mori Not Sonam Kapoor

& Bronze to Jacqueline Fernandes and not Anushka Sharma :D
The Crimes of India
On 13th August 2012, Mumbai, India.
 By our Spatial Correspondent.
Famine India, a well known magazine known for its Anorexic models of Woe Men of Sub Dance, Anounced Organising a pre-selection competition for selecting Bollywood Dancing experts to represent India at The Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 2016 Olympics.  
The Judges
Amma Mawlini
Why Janti Mala
The Nun who wears Jaya Prada  


Hickey CON Tractor                       : Futness Expert
Sab Hira Mar Chanta                       : Languish & Etiquette Trainer
Ja Munna Bai                                   : Ismail Bye expert
A Tool Cause Baker                        : Lukka Expert
So Hail Khan                                     Teaching Humour
Malai Kha Khan                                Butterring and Butter Finger practice to make look like makkhan
Helen                                                Facial Expression
Dance Choreography Team

Qualification : Must Be Obese & Fat see here
Geeta Kapoor, Farah Khan, Saroj Khan, Ganesh Hegde, Ahmed Khan & Vaibhavi Merchant.

Remo                                                : Brake Dance Expert
Ustad Debut                                     : Neev & Mawd urn    
Trance                                              : Hip Hope Beep Baap
Meet Hun Chuck Her Party             : To Lagao Kya Vaat Kya Vaat Kya Vaat

The Crimes of India
Rio De Janeiro, Brazil
12th August, 2016.
With arrangement of Vengaboys singing Brazil
by Our Special Olympics correspondent, Bored Ya Masoom Yaar.

                Indian Olympics Contingent won 9 medal that is again repeating the 150% rate of 2012 London Olympic Games, and also a reminder to the London2012 had a similar taste of The Indian Hockey Contingent for the Bollywood Dancing Strong contingent of 6 they won
The Wooden Spoon

Many wooden Spoons Because
We Sent Sonakshi Sinha, Sonam Kapoor & Anushka Sharma all who failed to bag a medal

This was the Tally of the 12 Certificate Holders
Position Medial/Prize               Name of The Participant    Country       Song/ Bollywood Number 
!            Gold                          Katrina Kaif                       Team GB Brittain  Kajrare & Chikni Chameli
2           Silver                         Barbara Mori                     Mexico                  Teri Chahat
3           Bronze                       Jacqueline Fernandes         Sri Lanka               Hale Dil Tujhko Sunata      
4           Certificate                  Gisselli Monteiro                Brazil(Home Team)    Tera Laung Gwachcha   
5           Certificate                  Rachel Shelley                    Team GB               Madhubhan Mein Jo
6           Cretificate                  Yana Gupta                       Chzech Republic    Laila Main Laila
7           Certificate                  Liza Ray                            Canada                  Shake It Saiyyan
8           Certificate                  Nargis Fakhri                     USA                      Sadda Haq
9           Certificate                  Bruna Abdullah                  Brazil(Home Team) Yedho Mayakkam 
10         Certificate                  Amy Jackson                   Team GB                 Jai Ho
11         Certificate                  Linda Arsenio                  USA                        Friday
12         Certificate                  Tania Zaetta                     Australia                  Salaam Namaste
13         nil                              Alice Patten                    Team GB                 Loose Control
14         nil                              Claudia Ciesla                 Germany                 Munni Badnam Hui
15         nil                              Rosa Catelano                  Italy                       Nakshatra 
16         nil                              Sonakshi Sinha                 India                      Dhadang Dhadang
17         nil                              Sonam Kapoor                 India                     Jhoom Jhoom Ta Tu
18         Wooden Spoon         Anushka Sharma              India                      Dance pe Chance Maar le
                                 Mix up caused it Mixed with                                      Ainvayi ainvayi
Hence The Wooden Spoon

Tough The whole Social media especially Twitter now partly owned by facebook was full of Twitpics and Instagram pics of Indians in Rio pictures with The Bollywood Sirens and the Hashtag #BollywoodDancingGoldSilverBornze was top trend for 3 days but by the evening it changed to #LakdikaChamchaLadkiKaKadhcha

Alas with a population of 1.4 billion, we could prduce Wooden Spoons, this was rubbing salt on the fact that India failed to qualify for Hockey, this time.

with Inputs from Salman Khan, Sohail Khan & Malaika Arora.Khan & Helen

Bore yaar adds that Sallu, Helen, Malaika & Sohail had a group photo with Katrina Kaif, which was retweeted by @SalmanKhanFC and many others and posted to Salman's Facebook account. 
@BeingSalmanKhan tweeted " On Public Demand  I had to dance Tujhe Aksa Beach Ghuma doon Aa chalti kya
                                     At the end of the day the Mod in the Indian Contingent and India was Sombre, with Lallo Yadav and Sharad Yadav demanmding enquiry why India failed. Raj Thakre Said that had Marathi Mulgi Item Dancer Rakhi Sawant had been sent, India would have definitely won a medal.
Read More about these participants HERE


If they Sent Helen She would have been Not Kom than Mary Kom who changed the colour this time