Monday, August 13, 2012

David Cameron says 2 hours of Bollywood Dancing cannot be categorised as a Sport. Venuspeak says Camera on Bollywood Dancing is a Great Sport But David Cameron is Not a Great Sport

If "Bolywood Dancing"

Were supposedly, included at #Rio2016

As an Olympic *Sport*

India would still get a wooden spoon!

Gold would go to Katrina Kaif & Not Sonakshi Sinha,

Silver to Barbara Mori Not Sonam Kapoor

& Bronze to Jacqueline Fernandes and not Anushka Sharma :D
The Crimes of India
On 13th August 2012, Mumbai, India.
 By our Spatial Correspondent.
Famine India, a well known magazine known for its Anorexic models of Woe Men of Sub Dance, Anounced Organising a pre-selection competition for selecting Bollywood Dancing experts to represent India at The Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 2016 Olympics.  
The Judges
Amma Mawlini
Why Janti Mala
The Nun who wears Jaya Prada  


Hickey CON Tractor                       : Futness Expert
Sab Hira Mar Chanta                       : Languish & Etiquette Trainer
Ja Munna Bai                                   : Ismail Bye expert
A Tool Cause Baker                        : Lukka Expert
So Hail Khan                                     Teaching Humour
Malai Kha Khan                                Butterring and Butter Finger practice to make look like makkhan
Helen                                                Facial Expression
Dance Choreography Team

Qualification : Must Be Obese & Fat see here
Geeta Kapoor, Farah Khan, Saroj Khan, Ganesh Hegde, Ahmed Khan & Vaibhavi Merchant.

Remo                                                : Brake Dance Expert
Ustad Debut                                     : Neev & Mawd urn    
Trance                                              : Hip Hope Beep Baap
Meet Hun Chuck Her Party             : To Lagao Kya Vaat Kya Vaat Kya Vaat

The Crimes of India
Rio De Janeiro, Brazil
12th August, 2016.
With arrangement of Vengaboys singing Brazil
by Our Special Olympics correspondent, Bored Ya Masoom Yaar.

                Indian Olympics Contingent won 9 medal that is again repeating the 150% rate of 2012 London Olympic Games, and also a reminder to the London2012 had a similar taste of The Indian Hockey Contingent for the Bollywood Dancing Strong contingent of 6 they won
The Wooden Spoon

Many wooden Spoons Because
We Sent Sonakshi Sinha, Sonam Kapoor & Anushka Sharma all who failed to bag a medal

This was the Tally of the 12 Certificate Holders
Position Medial/Prize               Name of The Participant    Country       Song/ Bollywood Number 
!            Gold                          Katrina Kaif                       Team GB Brittain  Kajrare & Chikni Chameli
2           Silver                         Barbara Mori                     Mexico                  Teri Chahat
3           Bronze                       Jacqueline Fernandes         Sri Lanka               Hale Dil Tujhko Sunata      
4           Certificate                  Gisselli Monteiro                Brazil(Home Team)    Tera Laung Gwachcha   
5           Certificate                  Rachel Shelley                    Team GB               Madhubhan Mein Jo
6           Cretificate                  Yana Gupta                       Chzech Republic    Laila Main Laila
7           Certificate                  Liza Ray                            Canada                  Shake It Saiyyan
8           Certificate                  Nargis Fakhri                     USA                      Sadda Haq
9           Certificate                  Bruna Abdullah                  Brazil(Home Team) Yedho Mayakkam 
10         Certificate                  Amy Jackson                   Team GB                 Jai Ho
11         Certificate                  Linda Arsenio                  USA                        Friday
12         Certificate                  Tania Zaetta                     Australia                  Salaam Namaste
13         nil                              Alice Patten                    Team GB                 Loose Control
14         nil                              Claudia Ciesla                 Germany                 Munni Badnam Hui
15         nil                              Rosa Catelano                  Italy                       Nakshatra 
16         nil                              Sonakshi Sinha                 India                      Dhadang Dhadang
17         nil                              Sonam Kapoor                 India                     Jhoom Jhoom Ta Tu
18         Wooden Spoon         Anushka Sharma              India                      Dance pe Chance Maar le
                                 Mix up caused it Mixed with                                      Ainvayi ainvayi
Hence The Wooden Spoon

Tough The whole Social media especially Twitter now partly owned by facebook was full of Twitpics and Instagram pics of Indians in Rio pictures with The Bollywood Sirens and the Hashtag #BollywoodDancingGoldSilverBornze was top trend for 3 days but by the evening it changed to #LakdikaChamchaLadkiKaKadhcha

Alas with a population of 1.4 billion, we could prduce Wooden Spoons, this was rubbing salt on the fact that India failed to qualify for Hockey, this time.

with Inputs from Salman Khan, Sohail Khan & Malaika Arora.Khan & Helen

Bore yaar adds that Sallu, Helen, Malaika & Sohail had a group photo with Katrina Kaif, which was retweeted by @SalmanKhanFC and many others and posted to Salman's Facebook account. 
@BeingSalmanKhan tweeted " On Public Demand  I had to dance Tujhe Aksa Beach Ghuma doon Aa chalti kya
                                     At the end of the day the Mod in the Indian Contingent and India was Sombre, with Lallo Yadav and Sharad Yadav demanmding enquiry why India failed. Raj Thakre Said that had Marathi Mulgi Item Dancer Rakhi Sawant had been sent, India would have definitely won a medal.
Read More about these participants HERE


If they Sent Helen She would have been Not Kom than Mary Kom who changed the colour this time

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